I celebrated my birthday a few months back and I must say it was one of the best birthdays’ of my life. I celebrated for the entire week and it was amazing! I have always been a person that enjoys birthdays. Maybe because I like celebrating, but mostly because I like cake and ice cream! And I do realize that no everyone doesn’t like to celebrate because its is celebrating getting older or whatever reason but I do! I embrace life and all that comes with it; including getting older.
I was leaving my job and out of the blue my male co worker came up to me and said, “Are you ever gonna have kids?” I was completely caught off guard and puzzled as to how this was any of his business. More importantly why he even felt that is was okay to ask me something like that.
So, as I stood there still shocked by his question he proceeded to say to me, ” You recently celebrated a birthday and you’re getting older. You’ll never get your body back!” I just stood there stunned not sure if this was real life and again why this was any of his business. So, I replied all of my friends have had children and they’ve all got their bodies back and then I said have you seen Teyana Taylor? He goes who is that? Is she is a celebrity? I said yes she is but that’s not the point she looks great.
I realized none of that is relevant. Then my anger kicked in and I said why is me having a baby any of your business and why do you think it’s okay for you to ask me that? His response, which was classic, he became defensive and got an attitude with me. Which was nuts because he was in the wrong here.
It made think of a few things; first one, what Gabby Sidobie says in her book title, Mind Your Own Your Body! Like how is me having a child your business or affect your life in any way? You’re not going to be the father, my husband, pay child care, or take care of me in any way. So, again how is this your business?
Second thing I thought, what makes you think I cant get my body back? That I’m not fine with potentially having more weight on me? Did he automatically think I don’t have kids because I don’t want to wreck my body? What kind of world are we living in where men think they get to comment on our bodies? And not just men really, people in general.
And lastly, I thought not all women want to have kids but it is very insensitive to ask a woman that question at all. What if I was a woman that isn’t able to have kids? What if I just suffered a miscarriage or something else? Bottom line never ask a woman questions or comment about her body, marriage, kids, or anything. Mind your Own Body!!